Love bade me welcome: yet my soul drew back,
             Guilty of dust and sing.
But quick-ey'd Love, observing me grow slack
             From my first entrance in,
Drew nearer to me, sweetly questioning,
             If I lack'd anything.

A guest, I answer'd, worthy to be here:
             Love said, You shall be he.
I the unkind, ungrateful?  Ah my dear,
             I cannot look on thee.
Love took my hand, and smiling did reply
             Who made the eyes but I?

Truth Lord, but I have marr'd them: let my shame
             Go where it doth deserve.
And know you not, says Love, who bore the blame?
             My, dear then I will serve.
You must sit down, says Love, and taste my meat:
             So I did sit and eat.

so i dont like poetry, but this one (called Love III) stuck out.  it's pretty much a summary of what we go through, isn't it? 

in other news.... i dont think i've ever been to this many classes in a quarter... EVER.  i'm quite proud of myself. and with that, im gone.  remember to live once in a while.

so here is my yearly update.  fall quarter has come and gone.  some say that it went by so fast, but to me, school can never go by fast enough.  and that's the truth.  i realized a lot of things this past quarter... about me, about the people around me.. about life.  here are ten things that i've come up with:

1) i will never know what it means to be a "good student"
2) i like to pretend things dont matter.. especially exams
3) people think and say im the biggest slacker in terms of school... who can blame them?
4) people think im a walking question mark
5) the last two week of the school quarter.. i drank LOTS of energy drinks.. seriously LOTS.
5) i think i know what i want in life (who i want to be, what i want to do, etc..), i go after it, but then it's not supposed to be.. basically, i'm realizing that it's God's way or the highway (cliche and stupid... i know)
6) i saw this on a poster... trust everyone but dont forget to cut the deck... poker terms: dealer shuffles, and to make sure he hasn't cheated, player on the right is supposed to "cut the deck"... to all you idiots, just make sure you watch your back.
7) "There can be no deep disappointment where there is not deep love." - said by MLK Jr. in his letter from Birmingham Jail.
8) i dont know if i'll ever understand the reason why im at Northwestern University
9) imma movie fiend
10) i day dream a lot

lot's of other things but those are the sort of juicy ones.  Just gotta be strong, move forward, and do what i gotta do.  Till next year, have fun with this update.  Sike, i'll try to update more often.  I hope you all have happy holidays

aite.. so here's wassap.  im at school and classes are ok but boring.  im not too behind on work and i've been pretty good in going to my classes (compared to my last two years of stupidity).  so that's aite.  but i've been realizing something about myself.  i desperately try to take matters into my own hands so that they happen when i want and how i want it.  it just doesn't flow that way.  it's not supposed to, cuz God knows i don't know what's best for me.  im reestablishing my personal definition of what it means to "trust in the Lord."  guess i gotta start with the Word:

"Trust in the Lord with all Your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight."

Proverbs 3:5-6

yea..

let go, let God.

school is almost here.  goodbye maryland=/.. hello illinois.  life is bittersweet.

so the retreat.  how can you put God's incredible works into words?  small groups, the praise, pilgrims progress, ministry time... im afraid i was more blessed than the kids.  to all who attended: when people ask how the retreat was, let's not try to describe it in words, but let it be known by the way we live...